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so, not this week.. not last week.. but the week before that at church sister dawson came up to me and apologized about all the things she had said. i started to cry a little only because the memories of what she had said to me before had made me upset. she said she's sorry and that she doesn't even know albert to talk bad about him to me. at first i was mad because i was thinking, "man.. it took her long enough". but my mom said.. hey, at least she said sorry and knew that it made me feel bad. so, we're on okay terms now i guess.

september first marked the "one year anniversary" of albert and i being boyfriend/girlfriend. we didn't do anything snazzy. just went to that new town square place on las vegas blvd. and just hung out and walked around. he's so wonderful. i just can't be without him. he's all i think about and i love him so much.

mark walton got baptized this passed saturday [september 13th]. i was pretty shocked. i knew he was coming in town for the weekend but i wasn't told he was getting baptized until an hour and a half before it happened!! i was so glad i found out though. he was gonna text albert 20 minutes before the ceremony was taking place! such a boy :P john barnhurst baptized him. he's so funny. after he dunked mark under the water he was like, okay.. i guess we're done! it just sounded funny because john is so melancholy when he speaks.

i started this webpage on blogger.com. it's sort of like a livejournal, but i probably won't write things that are similar the entries i make on here. it's call the undecided life of a college student. just has updates about my life and stuff like that.

well, school has started and i've made a few friends. of course most of them are boys. but i don't mean to make it sound like i'm a dude magnet. guys are just way easier to talk to. when school first started i'd try to make small conversation starters with some of the girls around me, but they'd just stare. i guess people are shy, but it's like c'mon.. we're in collge now. you gotta be a little outgoing. one girl from my psychology class is my anthropology class this year and she's cool. i don't know her name though :/ another one from anth. is brad foss. i had seen him on myspace and stuff and knew he went to Basic. so now we're myspace friends and we walk to class together and stuff. another sort-of-friend i've made is Michael Penaco? i think. i've only caught a glimpse of his name from his papers and stuff. he's more like an accquaintance i guess, but he's cool. he must think i'm okay if he sits next to me every time in environmental science when he really doesn't have to. he's cool though.

i miss jacob and rachel. they're in reno. they're coming down for the UNLV vs. Reno game though! so i'm excited for that. mark is coming down too. i miss karli too! she said she was gonna come down in october, but tyler thompson told me otherwise. so i don't know what's going on.

it's starting to get cool outside! mostly during the evenings though.

Feb. 11th, 2008

every time i see him, every time i'm with him, every time he kisses me, every time he holds me.

i melt.

he's the best thing that has ever happened to me.
i love him so much.

Sep. 17th, 2006

my mind was somewhere else today in sacrament.

usually i'm sitting in sacrament whispering to tanya, but i feel like that's not setting such a good example for her. sacrament is a time to be reverent. i mean, you can talk once in a while, but it seemed like i was thinking about a lot of stuff.

during the talks i was thinking about kristen and how things will never be the same with her and i anymore. i feel like even telling her "you know things will never be the same between us anymore, right?"

it's just that, now, when i hang out with her.. if i ever do i just feel awkward. we have different friends and i'd like to say that i haven't changed. but i'm sure we both have in ways.

and i was also thinking about the message i wrote to brent. i finally told him that i like him, but i was probably too late. too late as in i should have told him the night we went to the movies. or the night we stayed up talking on the phone until 3am. the only reason i wait so long to tell someone that i like them is because i fear rejection like you wouldn't believe. now i'm kind of scared to run into him tomorrow at school, but you know what? that's life. and i'm not going to make it ruin my year.

sunday school was quiet until brother boyle misspelled something. so that broke the ice. and when he called me april. the boys got a kick out of that. i love my ward. they are great people. i'm so glad that my sister didn't move out of state or anything. because if she did.. i probably wouldn't be going to church anymore.

i'm loving school and i'm loving my life. there are a few bumps in the road, but nothing can stop me.
i love jumping to conclusions.

note: sarcasm.





:D

Sep. 13th, 2006

sometimes i'm afraid that when i go to the orthodontist in a week and a half he'll tell me that i won't be able to get my braces off because every time i clench my teeth.. they don't line up.

i think it's from playing my piccolo. they way you play it makes your lips like tighten and stuff so it smashes you teeth together ha. i'm just being a worry wart about it. so it's no big deal.

i got a voicemail today from what it sounded like was landon. he told me a story about how he was with 2 friends and told them how cool autumn wilkins is. or something of that sort. i miss that fool. haha. he's great.

so last weekend was the best. andy natara catelyn mike and ryan. i could spend hours [which i did] with those kids. andy kept 'hella merkin' everyone. even kicked me in the leg hahah. all i can say is that it was a lot of fun. i always have fun when i'm with any of them.

most of the time, i can barely write about something big that happened on THE day it happened. i have to wait a couple days or something and then i'm able to explain it better.

my english lit class is driving me crazy. i wish ms palacios taught it. or at least ms moses. i just can't stand my teacher.

now my mom is telling me to go to bed.
love.
so being a senior is pretty sweet.
i had the best first week of school i've ever had.
then this weekend i find out that one of my good friends like me. not only did i find out from one of my friends, but the next night he calls me and TELLS me he likes me. i feel really bad because i don't see him in that way at all. he's like a brother to me. i practically tell him everything. now, i can't. gahhh. i can't just not talk to him when i see him at school now. that's messed up. my mom says i have to explain to him that i just want to be friends soon.

tanya is getting baptized on saturday and i'm speaking at her baptism. i can't wait. i'm soo proud of her.

she bore her testimony this past sunday. everyone got up after her and everyone said something about how good it was. because it really was. i even bore my testimony. it was the first time i had in front of the congregation. ahh i just can't wait.

back to the thing about my friend. i'm getting sick over it. i told myself i wasn't going to worry about this kind of stuff this year. it would make the year bad for me i don't know. everything will be fixed soon.


lkjsdlkfjsd.

Aug. 26th, 2006

i wish my 18th birthday would come just a little sooner so i wouldn't have to ask my mom to stay out past 11. which is the legal curfew. oh well. i'm home. safe and sound.

i really do love making plans with jasmine. first it started out with the band dinner. we did a little demo for the parents and then marched up to the field. they did the traditional 'drill down' where i was in like the last 4 people. i felt so proud of myself because i've never made it that far in a drill down before. then of course i flinch and then get out ha.

well, i had jasmine and lesley follow me to my house so i could change real quick and then we went to nick's house to pick him up. allll of us piled into my truck where we went to the speedee mart to get gas. jasmine always gives me money when i drive her places. she's amazing ha. she even bought my food at sonic. before sonic, we went to wal mart so jasmine could buy the new hellogoodbye cd ha. that was fun. they called it the ghetto wal mart.. but i see nothing wrong with it ha. lesley's mom met us at sonic so lesley had to leave. but i put in my old hellogoodbye cd and me and nick sang to 'bonnie taylor shakedown' while jasmine listened to music on her phone haha. then i drove jasmine back to nicks house so she could get her car where we all went to jasmine's ha. yay for meaghan coming over. we just hung out there for a while.

when jasmine's parents came home i took meaghan to her house so she could meet up with some of her other friends who asked me if i had shrooms. oh dear. hahah it's okay meaghan. i got your text :P

then i took nick home. aw :] he makes me get them butterflies ha. too bad i didn't give him a hug haha.

Aug. 23rd, 2006

i seriously love kayla.
we don't see eachother but every couple of months or so, and we just have the funnest conversations.

i don't feel lame when i talk to her. hahah. we're gonna beat box, make a dollar basket for anne, and i'll tell her when i start to sweat when we go into hollister.

dreamm date.
it seems like i was going to write about something earlier. like a week or two ago.

anyway.
bandcamp is almost over. today everyone pretty much got baked. everyone is either red or brown. i'm a reddish brown. i can feel the heat coming off of my arms and my head hurts haha. but it's all for the heart of band, right? gay that i couldn't hang out with andy tonight. while i was in the shower my mom was like uhh it's almost nine. cerfew on weeknights is 10. i don't think you can go out. andy, catelyn, and i hung out sunday night. i swear those two crack me up. i could just sit and talk with them for hours. my mom was upset cause i wasn't home at 930pm on the dot that night. i got home at 940. so she was like. yeah, you were supposed to be home at 930. alksjdflskd.

i feel bad cause when my mom and i were at the NICKELBACK [haha] concert i was like 'ahhh! i can't wait til school starts!' because i'm just going crazy at home ha. i was just joking though. her and my sister were just messin with me.

but now that i remember what i was going to write about earlier... my mom, sister, and i went to the nickelback concert this past saturday ha. it was pretty fun. hinder, chevelle, and hoobastank opened for them. way too much saying of the F word. that's probably the only part i didn't like. i mean, yeah, here and there is okay.. but it was way too much. oh well. what do you expect? ha. there were some crazy people there too. quite the experience. we walked past 'rum jungle' i was like ahh let's go in! haha.

well, tomorrow we go to band from 4-9. i can't wait to sleep in tomorrow morning. it's a nice break. thursday is the same schedule and friday i'm really not sure of what's going on. but that night is the band dinner. it's a demo of what we've been doing that we show our parents. we're even putting on the whole first movement to show them ha. i'm excited. then AFTER that i'm hanging out with nick, jasmine, and lesley. hopefully the group of 6 will get together again. minus landon cause he's off in utah now :[ anywho. that's pretty much it for now.

school starts in one week!

Aug. 17th, 2006

first day of bandcamp today!
i remember being a freshman and coming in not knowing anythinggg.

sometimes it can be hard though. there's one girl in the flute section who's from a different middle school than all the others. so she doesn't really know anyone. i talk to her, but she doesn't really say anything back. so it's kinda hard to communicate. she'll open up though. all of them will. one girl, toni, keeps telling 'ahh i'm so nervous! i don't know the music!' haha. i keep telling her it's okay. that she will get it :] she even asked me if i was scared when i was a freshman. i told her of course!! it's normal. she's a cute girl.

we won't be marching outside a lot until next week. that'll be funn ha. i really need a tan though. i told danica i'm gonna turn into a tan ethiopian. and we agreed that i'd act like the foreign exchange student that's living with her haa. ughh i stopped writing for a while and now i have to go to beddd.

i lovee cute conversations :]]

night.

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